I met Pauliina via Rethink Wellbeing's facilitator training. From the first session my methods seemed to work very well for her and play into her strong emotional and cognitive flexibility.

After 15 sessions she answered some questions.

Pauliina

- What surprised you about my coaching?

"It often surprises me how much better I feel after our sessions and how much my mood can change from worse to better during a session."

- How do you experience me as a coach?

"Tilman is very mindful in how he's allowing my own process to unravel without interrupting or interfering. Sometimes I feel like I talk too much, sometimes there are silent moments, but it always seems to be ok."

- What's a memorable moment from our sessions and why?

"One time Tilman helped me overcome an obstacle I had struggled with for years by simply asking the right question at the right time."

- What kind of people could benefit from my coaching?

"I would recommend talking to Tilman if you feel stuck or slow in overcoming your obstacles. His coaching might be particularly useful for someone who tends to overthink or dwell on their issues. [...]"

- What has my coaching done for you?

"In my sessions with Tilman, I've had many groundbreaking realizations and eureka moments. I've been able to identify my deepest underlying issues to then prioritize in my psychodynamic therapy sessions. Tilman has helped me have a healthier perspective and relationship to my struggles."

Independent AI safety researcher

Katharina is the first person I worked with over an extended period. We connected at an EA conference. I was happy she accepted my offer to try my coaching.

After 20 sessions she answered some questions.

Katharina

- How do you experience me as a coach?

"Tilman has a good feeling for guiding me through the sessions, pausing in the right moments and asking me in what direction we should go if we reach a branch point. When I easily get lost in details, he has a good sense for deciding when and where to redirect the conversation.

Tilman is a calm and patient coach who is easy to talk to and trust. He also finds a good balance between encouraging me to set myself goals between sessions, while not putting any pressure on me if I don't end up doing them. The sessions feel like a safe space in which I can say whatever comes to my mind without having to fear his judgment in any way."

- What's a very memorable moment from our sessions and why?

"I remember one session in which I was able to connect with some negative feelings that I had been struggling to face, and when this happened, I also felt a wave of relief and happiness for finally having faced them, which was a surprisingly positive experience and helped me gain more trust in facing those moments and feelings.

Another moment that stood out to me was when I mentioned that, while I had made progress on many points, I still felt like it would take a lot of time for me to overcome my biggest fears once and for all. He disagreed. This sparked one of the most memorable discussions about change, as well as the hidden benefits or functions of having other people help you solve your problems."

- What has my coaching done for you?

"Through the coaching sessions, I was able to develop a surprising inner calmness towards some topics. It is as if I finally found a source of stability within myself that I can connect with more often than before. I noticed that I have an easier time trusting myself and can see things from a different angle than before. I often find myself thinking about the coaching sessions in difficult moments and imagine what my conversation with Tilman would look like if we were to talk through that in a coaching session."

- What surprised you about my coaching? What's special or unusual about it? What is different compared to other support options you have tried?

"I've been very positively surprised by the reflection sessions we have every couple of weeks. They make me feel encouraged to contribute more actively and try new things, and they are a great opportunity to reflect on what I might need going forward. In one of those, Tilman also gave me feedback on how he experiences me during the sessions, which has been very insightful for me as well.

What stands out to me is that he doesn't just give me answers right away. Instead, he asks questions that make me pause and think a bit for myself, one step at a time. I actually get encouraged to think things through and reach some conclusions by myself, while getting valuable input and guidance along the way.

That's quite different from what I've experienced before. In some formats, I was mostly presented with ready-made answers and metaphors. In others, I talked about my week without feeling like I was getting anywhere. In his coaching, Tilman finds a sweet spot in which he still offers me different points of view and new framings, but not before I get a chance to take the first steps myself. I feel like I'm making genuine progress, and a lot of that comes down to him consistently asking the right questions at the right moments."

- How do you experience our sessions?

"Tilman guides the session in a calm and confident way, allowing me to feel, think, and express myself freely. I especially enjoy the meditations at the beginning of the session, which are all unique but all help me to reconnect with myself before diving into the more profound topics.

Even though I sometimes feel like running in circles during the coaching, I am surprised that those circles finally end up somewhere in most of the cases. I always leave with a good and energised feeling."

PhD student, AI safety